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Sure enough, when he arrived in town, he called. I think labels do more harm than good. It was the first time I had ever experienced something with another guy. It was a few days just before Thanksgiving and everyone had left campus to go home for the holiday, except for me and two other guys staying in the dorms. At the end of the night, Mike invited me back to his place to chill.

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I remember telling him my shoulder was messed up from a bad play and he offered to massage it to relax the muscle.

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Back then, I think I was just figuring things out and he was somebody to do that with. I think labels do more harm than good. Guys know what other guys are like. The issue with many labels is they come attached with set assumptions and even some negative associations about how someone who identities with that label must be and live their life. When I was 19, I used to play ball in our neighborhood league. When I gave him my number, I knew exactly what I was doing.

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Guys know what other guys are like. Are these men secretly gay and in hiding? Over the course of a year, it happened a few times. Finding a gay man who has experience in this was not difficult at all. One of the two dudes was out on campus. When I was in college, I played football.

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